Intro to Aspergers Syndrome

Intro to Asperger Syndrom (A.S.)

This is quite rough still...

Asperger Syndrome, a.k.a. A.S., is a label given to kids with certain characteristics. The most striking one being slowness to develop social understandings- even little or no natural sense of other people. They often have an above-average IQ and develop deep interests in one or more narrow subjects, often supplemented with precocious language ability and seemingly exceptional memory. They often are slower to develop self-monitoring and self-control.

Of course, these are gross generalization. Each person is different, and A.S. is just an umbrella term which many A.S. and non-A.S. people find useful. (My son alternately finds comfort in it and distances himself from it, he sometimes says he's a neurotypical with some A.S.-like traits, and sometimes says he's an A.S. person who can function with neurotypicals.)

When you or your child is very different from others, especially to the point of not fitting in, not finding friends and failing in school, a label can help you find help, strategies, others like you and the understanding that though you don't fit in, it's because others, including schools, have narrow expectations and conventions, rather than because you or your child is not worthy or able.

Almost all of life is social, in particular, almost all of school is social. Though a child without a social sense could keep busy learning for years in the right setting, produce wonderful output and go to to excel in a career, in public school he or she is doomed.

The knowledge and skills that are taught are taught with no motivation (rather than for survival or to build things.) Though many A.S. kids plod through school doing what there is to be done, many find no reason to excel, especially when other neurodevelopmental struggles present obstacles.

Many of them have better than average memories and are very strong at visual processing. Temple Grandin, whose books are mentioned on the books page, has extraordinary stories of these talents.

My son had to learn to look others in the eyes. It turns out it's a little overwhelming. He says he can't pay attention to the subject matter in school if he's paying attention to the teacher's face and expressions. Many of these people, but not all, are weak in their motor coordination.

I can only begin to tell you how different my son it, or what it's like to live with him. He doesn't like most videos or television, except a few cartoons. He's adept at leaving theatres and turning off the TV, but loves Pokemon and Yu Gi Oh. He hates suspense in books and will skip to the ending to make sure it's okay. If it's not, he'll avoid the book.

In general he finds it hard to endure strong emotions. At age 12, a happy thought will send him skipping into the distance while a bit of stress can make him stop in his tracks.

Some say that A.S. kids mature at about 2/3 the usual pace. This seems about right, on average. But in some ways, it's too high, and in other ways, way too low.

To the parent of an A.S. kid, I suggest to be with your child. Take his or her side. Accept her as she is, but realize that those expectations that you've finally reigned in may be completely wrong in a day or two.

One more anecdote. In... kindergarten, my son was also diagnosed with "upper body instability." He doesn't feel secure in space, especially reaching out to catch a ball or jostling with kids. He always stood at the ends of lines where he could move around and daydream more at his own pace and not have to be surprised by others touching him unexpectedly. He completely avoided sports.

One day, around age 9, at his 3-years younger brother's little league practice, he suddenly got jealous of the throwing and catching. I snagged a ball and threw it to him. His intense powers of concentration overcame his instinctive fear of balls and he reached out and caught it, stiff arm. Over the next 10 minutes, he caught the ball almost every time, at a distance of about 20 feet, and awkwardly threw it back. Then he stopped. I tried every year or so to get him to throw and catch a bit, but he won't. Throw him a ball and usually it hits him and falls to the ground... I'll keep trying. When he's ready for things, I don't want to be stuck in my preconceptions of him.

Be flexible. I find it helpful to be firmly convinced that school is only appropriate for a small percentage of kids. Many experts say such things. In fact, the grades kids get are a much better judge of the school than the child. Schools produce a good chunk of the success we have in this society partially by their results, partially despite their results. Imagine what appropriate schools could produce!

Albert Einstein, Bill Gates and Charles Darwin were among the many individuals who did poorly at school and/or thought it not particularly valuable who went on to great achievements. The list is huge among Aspies. And non.