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Life is so cerebral. Almost two years ago I began exercising an hour a day. This came about half a year after a seminar in which we looked deeply into our experiences and distinguished the meanings and stories about our experiences from the actual experiences. Since then, I've found myself increasingly noticing my sensations and perceptions while walking and exercising.
I commute the one and a half miles to work most days on foot. As I walk, I feel the sun and wind on my exposed skin. All over my body, cloth gently touches my skin. In some places it clings. In others it rubs gently. In others it gently taps and billows and around my waist, my elastic belt squeezes gently and the weights of my belly pack and water bottle tug and bounce.
Huge pressures are constantly changing in my feet and legs. Smaller pressures change in my hips and back. If I tune into the feelings in shoulders and neck, I can feel horizontal ribbons of sensations crossing my back, and vertical strands down the sides of my neck. The most pronounced feelings on my arms are of my short sleeves touching first the back, then the front of each arm. Paying closer attention, I feel vibrations channeled through the ligaments of my forearms to my wrist. And subtle sensations come from the momentum of the skin in the arms and hands as the bones pull them back from a swing. If I concentrate, I feel similar effects in my toes.
Meanwhile the sights and sounds flood my eyes and ears with a symphony of input. My brain quiets with the concentration of listening to all the impacts within while stretching my attention to include everything outside. Walking briskly, I feel my leg muscles warm and my back and torso begin to sweat. The fresh air streams into my nose, cooling my nostrils and expanding my gut and chest. Then the light pressure is released as the breath swooshes out of my mouth, gently vibrating my lips.
If I start to jog, a whole different world of sensations occur, plus all sorts of thoughts about "effort" and "I can't" and "will this injure my feet" and on and on...
I've had muscle-kneading massages. The experience was one of touch, mild pain, moderate pain and occasionally acute pain followed by relief as the pain stopped and the sensations of touch were left. Perhaps it was "enjoyable" merely because it was so different from most experiences. Or perhaps simply because it involved being touched by another person.
In my life I've experienced a lot of loneliness and disconnection. It was all an illusion, a masking of the world around me.
On my walks, the environment massages me. The rich caresses, touches and pounding forces remind me I'm intricately connected, joined and united with the world.
Note: This is draft 2, on the 27th...
Copyright 2010, Randy Strauss>